I Meant Cockatiel Party

richwhitelesbian:

we need some new and more powerful swears

(via lindsaychrist)

LIFE HACK

asap-tran:

really-shit:

If your phone gets wet, try putting it in a bag of dry rice. At night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you.

fuck

(via kanyewesticle)

egg-rolls:

my hobbies include being right and petting other peoples cats

(via askdarrin)

rodneykong:

lizardsfromspace:

Here’s a hilarious Helen Keller joke!

Do you know what no one saw or heard coming?

Helen Keller’s radical socialist activism for the rights of the poor, women, the disabled. And so people ignored and belittled her politics. They argued a deaf, blind person could not know what she was talking about. And so they reduced her to the safe story of a young girl who overcame disability, and nothing else.

Wait I mean haha she was blind! How funny.

dam didnt see that coming lol